Friday, November 11, 2011

Lest You Think I'm Super Smart . . .

Because that was *totally* happening, right? You were all, "Wow, Kim is so highly intelligent, we can barely understand a word she says!" I know. People ask me if I'm a member of MENSA all.the.time. It gets a little old.

Ahem.

Anyway. I know I'm an intelligent woman. I know it. But then I went and admitted something to someone the other day and then started writing down all the silly/stupid/weird thoughts I've had and things I've done that plain do not make sense. Lord have mercy, there are many. So many that I made it into a little blog post with just the quick ones, the ones I could write out in a line or two. I think I may have mentioned a couple before, but they are so good they should be repeated. You're either going to love this or never come back because of my absolute stupidity on occasion.

So, here we go: (don't judge. Love)

*It wasn't until I started blogging that I understood what ads were for on blogs. I didn't 'get' that they linked backed to something. I was all, "Why would some company pay you to put their face on your blog? It's not like it does anything." Yeah.

*I once put on a pair of pants only to discover that they were too big - like a full size too big. I'd lost weight, without even trying! I strutted around all day, all proud of my hot self. When I took them off that night I discovered that they were my 'fat' pants and were a size bigger than I was.

* I once tried to get rid of the smell of gasoline on my husbands clothes by lighting candles.

*Last Christmas I had the kids make a Post It note paper chain for the Christmas tree. I got the idea from Momma Kiss. She rocked it. Me? Well. I used my husbands 'vintage' Star Trek Post It notes. That aren't made anymore. Winning!

*I needed to call 911 one time. And I forgot the number.

* This past April I found a filter on my vacuum cleaner that said 'clean every 6 months.' The vacuum is 5 years old.

*When President Regan died and they did the 21 gun salute, I asked my husband, "Are those live shells?" What I wanted to know was, are blanks just as loud as live shells. But that's not what I said. Without missing a beat he said, "Yup. They're shelling the town. Here's your sign." We still laugh about it today.

Now, 'fess up and tell me something you've thought/done that belongs on my list :)