Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Metabolism: It Sucks

So. I started my husband and myself on The Flat Belly Diet. I love it. Like, love it, love it. It's real, honest to goodness food. I've actually been cooking many of the recipies for the past year I just haven't been following the uhm, portion control part. And now I am. So a week ago I said I'd had enough and went for it. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. All Flat Belly, all the time. I measure, I weigh. I love.

Why am I telling you this? Am I selling you this diet? Am I being paid by the Flat Belly people to talk them up? Uhm. . not so much.

I'm telling you to let you know that I.am.dieting. I am weighing my food. I am measuring every darn thing that I cook. It's all delicious and I am enjoying the food, don't get me wrong. But I'm working at it.

And I'm not whining.

My husband? Is.

Last Sunday he laid on the sofa moaning about how he was weak with hunger, his head hurt, he wasn't sure he could make it up the stairs, that I was starving him. He accused me of not knowing how to lose weight. Of not knowing how to diet. I know. The man is lucky to be alive. I allowed him to live, after I hissed at him,

"Have you ever had to wear a bikini? In front of a guy you liked? Wear a prom dress? A bridesmaid dress? With a butt bow? How about a wedding dress? Wait! Did you birth three babies and then lose all the weight you had gained each and every time? No? You didn't? Right, because that.was.me."

Anyway, the point is he lived, but whined. Then on Wednesday he weighed himself and discovered he had lost 7 pounds. I made him go upstairs and weigh himself again, because obviously he doesn't know how to read a scale. It was still 7 pounds lighter.

Grr. I mean . . . yeah!! Good job, babe! Way to go! Let me just chop and weigh this ham for you . . . then I'll go weigh myself . . . and well . .. no.weight.lost.

Of course not. At least he conceded that I just might know what I'm talking about.

And now, he's lost a total of 9 pounds.

The truly awesome thing is, he says that this is the point where he usually stops because he thinks to himself, hey I lost a few pounds so I can eat that cookie or whatever. But now he's inspired by the weight loss and is asking me to help. He's asking me how many calories he gets per meal, what that looks like and what a meal should be.

Even awesomer would be if I lost 9 pounds.