Thursday, June 2, 2011

Puddle Jumping

**My spell check is not working and neither is my 'save' function so please excuse any mistakes!

You may, or may not, have noticed, that I haven't posted. I took an impromptu blog-vation to do some thinking about this little blog of mine and what I have to say, what I want to say.

When I last posted, I had big plans. That I told you all about. And then I totally didn't follow through. And they are things that I need to say, things that must be said. Things that must be put out here.

I have some 'house cleaning' to do before I continue down the path of posting about my struggle with depression. I have some fears regarding posting about it right now that need to be taken care of.  So until I take care of those issues, well, I'm putting my issues on the back burner. 

While on my blog-vation some interesting things did happen.

John sent us to the emergency room, again. Yes, you read that correctly. The E.R. AGAIN. He sprayed bug spray in his eye. Thankfully it was a natural spray and deet free, so it was just really, really painful. And really, really loud. I flushed his eye (and flooded the kitchen and soaked myself and him in the process) for about 20 minutes while Violet freaked out (shocker). We took him to the E.R to make sure his cornea wasn't scratched (it wasnt') and to make sure his oxygen levels were OK (at 101% they were) because all bug sprays have something called hydrocarbons in them and those are dangerous if swallowed/aspirated. The amusing part (because there is always an amusing part with us) is that the next time I went to put bug spray on John he clutched his eye and yelled, "Not in my eye, Mommy!" Nice. As though I were the one who sprayed it there to begin with. Thankfully were with family so I didn't have to explain anything.

Our pool opened on Saturday so we all piled in the van with the bajillion things we need to have fun and off we went. But I couldn't find Sarah's one piece. Which means her bum will hang out. She has a serious problem. Serious. As in her cousins have nicknamed her 'Full Moon' and she'll be wearing only dresses to school in the fall. You should know that there is a lifeguard/swim coach at the pool who is hot. Gorgeous. I stare at her. Her name is Sarah. She does not have a problem with her bathing suit falling down. But on Saturday? She heard my husband yelling things like: Sarah! pull up your swim suit! Sarah! I see your bum! Sarah! Nobody wants to see your bum!

And every.single.time her head would whip around to see who was yelling her name. And I'd be curled up laughing, avoiding eye contact because ohmygodwhatdoIsay?? Suddenly my husband opened his mouth, yelled, "Sarah, pull down your bathing suit" and abruptly stopped. Then started to glare and laugh at me. He'd come thisclose to yelling, "Sarah, pull down your bathing suit, I see your nipples." That's one of the best presents ever.

That present?? Can only be topped by these four: My brother is going to be a dad!! And he thought baby's eyes didn't open until they were six weeks old. Then, when I told him I was getting his wife a prenatal massage, he said, "Great, but how will they massage the baby?" And then, on Sunday he revealed that, "Kids don't walk until they are like, two years old." He is honestly the most intelligent  man I know, besides my husband. Honestly. And yet . . .

Swim team practices started this week. Sarah had her first practice yesterday. I was very nervous. She is not a strong swimmer. And by that I mean she can't swim. But this is how we started Violet, and you'll remember that by the end of the season Violet could swim the length of the pool and actually won a race. So. Sarah jumped in, bobbed to the surface, took a couple strokes, grabbed Hot Sarah (as she is forever known) and they worked together for the remainder of the practice. It went very well. After the practice we were in the locker room and I was telling Sarah what a great job she'd done. She grinned at me and announced, "I know! I did great! And I didn't even drown!"

Also, I got an iPhone!! And that way cool App Instagram that I am abusing regularly. So if you have an iPhone, find me and let's share pictures! I'm babyfeet3. This iPhone deal is amaze-balls. Every day I'm discovering new things I can do with it. I can scan things in the store with it, then check to see if they are cheaper on Amazon.com, and if they are, order them right then. Starbucks can scan my card from my phone. Wait. NO. We are not loading that App. Do  you have any idea how insanely dangerous that is?